I Dare You Not To Laugh

Expert Safe-Crackers

2008-10-01T19:46:00.000-07:00

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

Natalie Portman SNL Rap

2008-04-05T15:53:00.001-07:00

Jim Gaffigan on christmas and Easter

2008-03-17T15:12:00.001-07:00

SNL: Hillaryus 3 a.m. Phone Call Ad Parody

2008-03-11T14:53:00.000-07:00

Cartman Styx Tribute

2008-02-23T14:15:00.000-08:00

Come Sail Away

Jim Gaffigan Bacon

2008-02-21T12:40:00.001-08:00

glumbert - Jim Gaffigan loves bacon

Doug Benson

2008-02-21T11:50:00.000-08:00

Audition

Segue Ways

A Clean Screen

2008-02-20T12:51:00.000-08:00

Major League Prank

2008-02-19T16:29:00.000-08:00

Phillie Kyle Kendrick gets "traded" to Japan.

Street Fighter: The Later Years - Part 1

2008-02-16T07:47:00.000-08:00

CollegeHumor looks into the lives of the Street Fighter combatants, 10 years later

Street Fighter: The Later Years - Part 2

2008-02-16T07:43:00.000-08:00

CollegeHumor returns to the lives of the Street Fighter characters 1 day later. But, like, 1 day later than 10 years later or whatever.

Street Fighter: The Later Years - Part 3

2008-02-16T07:41:00.000-08:00

The saga of the world warriors continues...

Street Fighter: The Later Years - Part 4

2008-02-16T07:39:00.000-08:00

The misadventures of Zangief, M. Bison, and the rest of the gang continues with the first of six new monthly episodes.

Street Fighter: The Later Years - Part 5

2008-02-16T07:37:00.001-08:00

Street Fighter: The Later Years - Part 6

2008-02-16T07:36:00.001-08:00

Street Fighter: The Later Years - Part 7

2008-02-16T07:34:00.000-08:00

Street Fighter: The Later Years - Part 8

2008-02-16T07:32:00.000-08:00

A Little Out Of Season- But Dog-Gone Funny (Thanx again Lee Lee)

2008-02-15T09:11:00.000-08:00

If you have a wacky pet you'll appreciate this prancing pup's smile provoking romp/hop through deep snow(looks like 2-4 ft.)

A Classic---Monkey WMD---Thanx to LDC

2008-02-14T08:16:00.000-08:00

Wax is not your friend! Thanx Jen

2008-02-12T09:18:00.001-08:00

CAUTION: Be prepared to laugh out loud...I laughed till I almost

cried as I could just see this happening!

All hair removal methods have tricked women with their promises

of easy, painless removal - The epilady, scissors, razors, Nair And

now...the wax.

My night began as any other normal weeknight. Come home, fix

dinner, and play with the kids. I then had the thought that would ring

painfully in my mind for the next few hours: 'Maybe I should pull the

waxing kit out of the medicine cabinet.' So I headed to the site of my

demise: the bathroom.

It was one of those 'cold wax' kits. No melting a clump of hot

wax, you just rub the strips together in your hand, they get warm and

you peel them apart and press them to your leg (or wherever else) and

you pull the hair right off. No muss, no fuss How hard can it be? I

mean, I'm not a genius, but I am mechanically inclined enough to figure

this out. (YA THINK!?!)

So I pull one of the thin strips out. Its two strips facing each

other stuck together. Instead of rubbing them together, my genius kicks

in so I get out the hair dryer and heat it to 1000 degrees. ('Cold wax,'

yeah...right!)

I lay the strip across my thigh. Hold the skin around it tight

and pull. It works! OK, so it wasn't the best feeling, but it wasn't too

bad. I can do this! Hair removal no longer eludes me! I am She-rah,

fighter of all wayward body hair and maker of smooth skin

extraordinaire.

With my next wax strip I move north. After checking on the kids,

I sneak back into the bathroom, for the ultimate hair fighting

championship. I drop my panties and place one foot on the toilet. Using

the same procedure, I apply the one strip across the right side of my

bikini line, covering the right half of my *hoo-hoo* and stretching down

to the inside of my butt cheek (yes, it was a long strip) I inhale

deeply and brace myself....RRRRIIIPPP!!!!

I'm blind!!! Blinded from pain!!!!....OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!! Vision

returning, I notice that I've only managed to pull off half the strip.

CRAP!!! Another deep breath and RRIIPP!! Everything is swirly and

spotted. I think I may pass out...must stay conscious...Do I hear

crashing drums???

Breathe, breathe...OK, back to normal.

I want to see my trophy - a wax covered strip, the one that has

caused me so much pain, with my hairy pelt sticking to it. I want to

revel in the glory that is my triumph over body hair. I hold up the

strip! There's no hair on it. Where is the hair??? WHERE IS THE WAX???

Slowly I ease my head down, foot still perched on the toilet. I

see the hair, the hair that should be on the strip. I touch. I am

touching wax. CRAP! I run my fingers over the most sensitive part of my

body, which is now covered in cold wax and matted hair.

Then I make the next BIG mistake...remember my foot is still

propped up on the toilet? I know I need to do something. So I put my

foot down. DANG!!!!!!!! I hear the slamming of a cell door. *Hoo-Hoo*??

sealed shut! Butt?? Sealed shut!

I penguin walk around the bathroom trying to figure out what to

do and think to myself 'Please don't let me get the urge to poop. My

head may pop off!' What can I do to melt the wax? Hot water!! Hot water

melts wax!!!

I'll run the hottest water I can stand into the bathtub, get in,

immerse the wax-covered bits and the wax should melt and I can gently

wipe it off, right??? WRONG!!!!!!!

I get in the tub - the water is slightly hotter than that used

to torture prisoners of war or sterilize surgical equipment - I sit.

Now, the only thing worse than having your nether regions glued together

is having them glued together and then glued to the bottom of the

tub...in scalding hot water. Which, by the way, doesn't melt cold wax.

So, now I'm stuck to the bottom of the tub as though I had

cement-epoxied myself to the porcelain!!

God bless the man who had convinced me a few months ago to have

a phone put in the bathroom!!!!! I call my friend, thinking surely she

has waxed before and has some secret of how to get me undone. It's a

very good conversation starter - 'So, my butt and who-ha are glued

together to the bottom of the tub!'

There is a slight pause. She doesn't know any secret tricks for

removal but she does try to hide her laughter from me. She wants to know

exactly where the wax is located, 'Are we talking cheeks or who-ha?'

She's laughing out loud by now...I can hear her. I give her the

rundown and she suggests I call the number on the side of the box.

YEAH!!!!! Right!! I should be the joke of someone else's night.

While we go through various solutions , I resort to scraping the

wax off with a razor. Nothing feels better then to have your girlie

goodies covered in hot wax, glued shut, stuck to the tub in super hot

water and then dry-shaving the sticky wax off!!

By now the brain is not working, dignity has taken a major hike

and I'm pretty sure I'm going to need Post-Traumatic Stress counseling

for this event.

My friend is still talking with me when I finally see my saving

grace.... the lotion they give you to remove the excess wax. What do I

really have to lose at this point? I rub some on and OH MY GOD!!!!!!!

The scream probably woke the kids and scared the dickens out of my

friend. It's sooo painful, but I really don't care. IT WORKS!! It

works!! I get a hearty congratulation from my friend and she hangs up

I successfully remove the remainder of the wax and then notice

to my grief and despair.... THE HAIR IS STILL THERE.......ALL OF

IT!!!!!!!!!!

So I recklessly shave it off. Heck, I'm numb by now. Nothing

hurts. I could have amputated my own leg at this point.

Next week I'm going to try hair color...... Now that's funny .

Notttttttttt

Big Sexy...This One's For You !!! Birthday Boy!!!

2008-02-11T12:37:00.000-08:00

You've Got To See This- Not So Much Funny As Just "Say Wah?"

2008-02-11T10:21:00.000-08:00

Submitted by LDC--Guess Jumbo JEC Won't Be Eating Out in Mississippi. Smoking Gun Has More Here.

Street Fighter: The Later Years - Part 1

2008-02-11T08:02:00.000-08:00

A Little Too Close To Home...

2008-02-09T08:12:00.001-08:00

Practical Joke

2008-02-05T14:53:00.000-08:00

10 Brick Karate Chop Attemp Video

2008-02-05T13:05:00.000-08:00

Will Ferrell Bud Light Ad

2008-02-05T12:44:00.000-08:00

Don't Taze Me Bro - Chewbacca Gets Stunned

2008-01-31T21:30:00.000-08:00

Don't me bro!

Scott Bateman: A racist Bible for horny teens

2008-01-31T16:47:00.000-08:00

Scott Bateman animates comedian Eugene Mirman, who appears on Comedy Central Presents this Friday. (Subscribe to Scott Bateman's iTunes video feed here).

Speeding ticket? Thanx JLC

2008-01-30T19:08:00.001-08:00

Top this for a speeding ticket

Just gotta love the Marines!

Two California Highway Patrol Officers were conducting speeding enforcement on I-15 near the Marine Corps Air Station, Miramar, CA. One of the officers was using a hand held radar device to check speeding vehicles approaching near the crest of a hill. The officers were suddenly surprised when the radar gun began reading 300 miles per hour. The officer attempted to reset the radar gun, but it would not reset and turned off. Just then a deafening roar over the treetops revealed that the radar had in fact locked onto a USMC F/A-18 Hornet which was engaged in a low flying exercise near the l ocation. Back at the CHP Headquarters the Patrol Captain fired off a complaint to the USMC Base Commander.

Back came a reply in true USMC style:

Thank you for the message, which allows us to complete the file on this incident. You may be interested to know that the tactical computer in the Hornet had detected the presence of, and subsequently locked onto your hostile radar equipment and automatically sent a jamming signal back to it. Furthermore, an air to ground missile aboard the fully armed aircraft had also automatically locked onto your equipment. Fortunately the Marine Pilot flying the Hornet recognized the situation for what it was, quickly responded to the missile system alert status and was able to override the automated defense system before the missile was launched and your hostile radar was destroyed.

Thank you for your concerns.

idareyounottolaugh blogspot idyntl

My Hands Are Bananas-- submitted by Stpd1

2008-01-28T22:59:00.000-08:00

Sponge Bob Soulja Boy--thanks to Greg

2008-01-28T22:49:00.000-08:00